EOC Week 10: Lawyer Jokes

Q: What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

A: Lipstick.

(http://www.iciclesoftware.com/LawJokes/IcicleLawJokes.html)

When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law before the criminal gets arrested, we call him an accomplice. When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law after the criminal gets arrested, we call him a defense lawyer.

(http://www.stromer.com/jokes/185jokes.html)

Question: Do you know how to save five drowning lawyers?
Answer: No.
Reply: Good!

(http://www.stromer.com/jokes/185jokes.html)

Question: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: How many can you afford?

(http://www.stromer.com/jokes/185jokes.html)

The National Institutes of Health have announced that they will no longer be using rats for medical experimentation. In their place, they will use attorneys. They have given three reasons for this decision:
1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats.
2. The medical researchers don't become as emotionally attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats.
3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that rats won't do.

(http://www.stromer.com/jokes/185jokes.html)

Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff. The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors. Bad News: There were three empty seats.

(http://www.stromer.com/jokes/185jokes.html)